It doesn't matter if you know someone well, or just in passing, watching another mother have to close a casket and say goodbye to her baby, is to truly witness a heart break. Such a tragedy is any parent's worse nightmare and I just wanted to take away all her agony and somehow bring her baby back.
Throughout the entire service, burial and reception, I tried to think of the right thing to say. Instead, while words eluded, the tears did not. The service was a full Catholic Mass and included beautiful songs and readings that made an attempt to give guidance.
However, the part that really struck me, was during Mass, on two different occasions, the sun came through the window and shined bright and warm on the little one's picture that was on the program. I had it laying on the pew next to me and looked at it several times throughout the service. But during those occasions, when the sun hit his face just right I could see the sparkle in his eyes and something told me he was alright, happy and already safe in heaven. On the inside of the program were the words to "You are my Sunshine," and because those words are special to me as well, I believe that this message, via sunshine, truly did mean something.
Throughout the remainder of the afternoon, as the clouds won their battle and the rain began to fall, I wished there was someway to give them their sunshine back, I wished more than anything for such a miracle. After all, I am a mother and the love you have for your babies is like nothing else. The most I could do was to take all the emotion of the day and bring it home, to find appreciation in the fragility of life and to hug my own little ones until they made me stop.
All my love and prayers for the family and friends of the angel laid to rest today.
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