A mom's life... always room for improvement or at least a diaper!

I can't even begin to count the number of times that people would hear how many children I have and say, "oh gosh, I only have one (or two) and it's hard, I don't know how you do it?!"  Over the years (I have been a mom of four since 2003)I have always responded the same way, "it's all relative, one or ten, it's a tough business being a parent."  I remember when Savannah was born and I was literally stumbling through trying to figure things out.  I have always believed that going from none to one is the hardest because all of a sudden, you are not just responsible for just you.  Now, every choice you make, every decision, has to be made with this little person in mind.

Today, I am a humble mother.  I have made and I am sure will continue to make my fair share of mistakes.  My choices as a young person, as a young mother continue to follow me over a decade later.  Yesterday, Savannah and I were talking about my becoming a mom so young, I told her how hard it was being a mother at twenty one.  While all my friends were just starting their life as bar hoppers, wearing sexy clothes and sleeping til noon, I was sporting nursing bras and sleep deprived.  I wouldn't change a thing, not one second of the time I spent home with her and her siblings. I loved the adventures of navigation life with four small children in tow or just navigating the world's biggest shopping carts, but the truth is, it often wasn't easy.

Today I was reminded that I'm still learning, or possibly the opposite, letting go of the attempt to be the world's best mom.  Max and I were getting dressed after swimming lessons at the YMCA.  I guess the truth is, I was getting dressed and Max was still naked having a snack on his towel.  Everyday I offer to dress him first risking a towel malfunction and a big reveal to the rest of the locker room, but he always responds in his little french accent, "no di-pear" (no diaper) and because he enjoys his snack in the buff.  Today was no different and so as I was quickly putting lotion on and getting dressed, I heard someone exclaim, ''he peed!" I quickly turned and low and be hold, there was my little Max, buck naked, standing and peeing in the middle of the locker room floor.  I quickly wiped it up and thinking he was done, went back to getting dressed.  He wasn't done and peed twice more.  In my defense, I was cleaning up number two when number three occurred.  He was shooting right and left, I just wasn't fast enough.  I just laughed and finally got smart and di-peared him. 

In the process clothes got wet and I had to apologize for my son using the women's locker room floor as a urinal, but in the end, it was what it was and we moved on.  I think that would maybe be the difference of number one, versus five or six.  You begin to learn that you don't have to take every situation too seriously.  If you condemn and critique everything you do and every choice you make, you'll make yourself crazy.  Let go and let them be naked.  If worse comes worse, make sense of it, as I did today when I said out loud, to no one in particular, "it's just pee, and probably chlorinated anyway because of all the pool water he swallowed."

Savannah will be fifteen in May and if you start mommy hood with pregnancy, I have been in the club for a decade and a half.  However, I am still learning that being a mom is a fluid and ever changing path.  When Savannah was a baby, she wore nothing but Pampers (preferably with Elmo on them).  Now Max wears Mom to Mom diapers by Safeway.  They are considered off brand, but they work better than the leaky paper thin Pampers and even the guaranteed leak proof Luvs and are half the price to boot!  Even diapers change in their quality, so that we as moms are kept on our toes and don't get too comfortable in our Elmo drawers. 

Being a mommy is wonderful.  This past weekend during Brayden's Flag football game as well as the girl's soccer games I was filled with pride as they played their little hearts out.  As I watched Saxton's coach praise her multiple times for her defensive skills and as Sage didn't allow a goal while on defense and got an assist on offence. I felt such pride.  At one point I asked the dad next to me, "is there another Sage on our team or is everyone cheering for my Sage?"  I gushed as he said, "no, they are just cheering for your Sage."  That felt pretty darn good.  Every time they come home with a good grade, or call to tell me how well they're doing in school or football (Sam) I feel pride.  These little, wonderful people make me the happiest mom in the world.

My six littles and their Grandma Richard.
When in doubt, call Grandma!

I have six children living in two different states and three different houses. I have to take into consideration Ex's and other mothers. I parent over text messages and through phones. My youngest is learning new words everyday but still has struggles with navigating stairs and my oldest is trying to find her way as a highschooler and learn how to say yes at the right times and no during the difficult ones. Good nights include both kisses on cheeks and over airways. Being a mommy is complicated because life is full of ups and downs and those are only multiplied when you have children. As a mom, I try to make the most of every moment and relive the special ones. One of my favorite memories at the lake this summer was when Sam and I fell asleep on each other. When I am sad and missing him terrible, I just close my eyes and remember that closeness and I have faith that we will have that again.

Sometimes being a mother is having to make the hardest choices you have ever had to make and live with them everyday after.  All I can do is love them the best way I can, encourage them, support them and let them go to make their own choices,  reminding them that I am always there.  Remind them that no matter where they are, what they are doing or have done, I will always love them, my love is unconditional. After all, let's be honest, their mom isn't perfect so how can I expect them to be?  Goodnight my babies. I love you Savannah, Sam, Sage, Saxton, Brayden and Max, to the moon and stars, moon and stars and back!