The Purpose Driven Run

Years ago I read a book called The Purpose Driven Life  It was meant to be a guide to how you were choosing to live each day. (You can click on the link to find out more information.)  This book came to mind tonight while I was on my run.  In the past few weeks and even the past year, I have been able to run more than I have since I was 18-19 years old (I am now 37.)  Because of having children, but probably more as a result of several injuries that I incurred while running, I gave it up for the most part, until last year when through Facebook, I found out about the Run for the White House for Childhood Cancer Awareness which has now become the largest virtual cross-country running event ever.  The purpose is to not only bring awareness, but also give support to families dealing with childhood cancer.  

Tonight as I was running, I literally was served a symbolic reminder of why we are all doing this.  It's been raining cats and dogs all day and while I was able to get the first mile in without much rain, by mile two is was steadily coming down.  I honestly didn't mind and was fine until someone decided to purposely drive through a large puddle of water, completely drenching me in the process.  It was at this point that I was reminded yet again why I was out here in the first place, at that moment I thought about all the babies I am running for and any small discomfort I might feel is nothing in comparison to what they deal with on a daily basis.  

The last thing I want this blog to come across is me trying to make myself look like a martyr.  I absolutely am not, its not about me, it's the complete opposite!  It's about something so much bigger than me or any of my fellow runners/walkers/bikers/swimmers who are logging miles, it's about the combined love that we all feel towards these little ones.  It's about having a purpose to our workouts, it's about running past aches and pains in order to give our team leader, Brian Jones, something to log.  It's about the huge inspiration that these children who are battling everyday, who are the true warriors, have become to us.  It's about Hailee, Jaydon, Missy, Lincoln, Talia, Nicholas, Sam, Ellie, Trent, Delaney, Leo, Ronan, Ethan, Colton, Heaven, Taylor, Ryan, Beth, Austin, Simon, Brooklyn and so many other little soldiers, some of who have already lost their battle, but still continue to inspire us. 

Everyday I am able to run I am grateful.  I know I am living on borrowed time as far as my body is concerned, but I thank God for every mile he allows me to knock out.  Sometimes when a certain song comes on Pandora, I swear He's cheering me on.  

My hope is to be able to keep this up until September, Childhood Cancer Awareness month.  My other huge hope, is to get others to join our quest.  Even if you aren't a runner, you can walk, bike, swim or even dedicate workouts to our kids.  One very inspiring story is about man who recently suffered a stroke and dedicated his physical therapy time towards miles, that's amazing!  Truly anyone can join us, all you have to do is log into Facebook, like our page and post your workouts on the Run For the White House for Childhood Cancer Awareness 2014.  That's it! The reality is that childhood cancer gets pennies to the dollar when it comes to funding and there is not enough being done currently to stop this epidemic, we need to bring light to this.  If you want to learn more, you can also check out this link, The Truth 365.  Come on, Let's do this, Let's kick Cancer's ASS!
  

deconstructive criticism

My ex recently had some lovely things to say concerning my blog.  I considered the source and in the end took it as a compliment that he chose to spend his precious time reading what I had to say.  In a day and age of racey magazines and internet gossip, I guess I should feel honored that anyone choses to reading about my boring ol' life.

I think all of us (and I assume if you found this blog you participate, if even just a little, in the great and powerful social media network), have to be prepared for what others might say or think.  We put our lives out there "on the line" (The Internship reference) and allow almost anyone into them.  They know when we break up and make up, get married, divorced, have a baby, get a new job or lose one, who our friends are and what we had to eat at the restaurant we just "checked into."  Class reunions are almost obsolete now because they happen every day on Facebook.

I don't have a problem with social media because I don't have a problem talking with complete strangers and chatting with them about basically anything.  The other day at Costco I met myself in the form of a man in his late seventies.  He talked to my husband and I about vacuums for over a half hour and ended our conversation by telling us how he was the orchestration behind some random couple getting married.  What does that have to do with anything? Some might say nothing, but I disagree.  To me what was impressive, was his ability to reach out to us and help us make a choice (he talked us into the Electrolux Cordless 2-in-one) via his ability to make a connection.  For once, I was pretty quiet during this chat fest (it was the day I sent off Savannah and Sam and I was emotionally and physically spent), but I took the opportunity of seeing myself in someone else, like an out of body experience.  I was okay with what I saw.  I later told my husband, now I know what's it's like to talk to me... (grin.)

Mom in socks in crocs!

People are going to criticize you.  It's inevitable in this thing called life.  However I choose to continue on with my life anyway.  This may be your first time reading this blog and if it is, you can see I don't post about the latest fashions (in fact my daughter Savannah thinks I need to be on an episode of what not to wear) or a new beauty tip. But, you might get the courage to voice an opinion of your own or learn to not take life too seriously and give yourself a break.  After all, if you need to feel better about your life, you can just read about mine.

Side Note:  This morning my two year old comes in to my bedroom, quite early and is sporting a chocolate mustache.  I ask him (not how he got out of his crib... a new venture of his... he finally has the courage since his leg broke last year) but what he had to eat.  He tells me "nothing" with a straight face and asks for a cheese stick.  I go downstairs and prepare myself for the worse (he's taken lessons from his older siblings on the ability to "seek and destroy.")  However, all I find is a carton of muscle milk and a small glass neatly poured.  Nice job Max!

8.01 miles for Childhood Cancer.

Children are a blessing and a spirit that lights up a household.  I remember one night when Max was literally bouncing off things, he was pile driving his dad and I, jumping on the couch, wanting to play catch with the football and kick the soccer ball. "Past the defense," he said and "into the net." He was full of vim and vigor as my grandma would say.

Then he went with his dad to pick up his brother and the house went quiet. No more giggles and gumption. I was sad. The time he was gone was a quiet I didn't like. I was truly greatful for his return and his exuberant hug and "hi mommy!"  Not having him and his siblings in my life is unimaginable and this memory brings me to a cause that has become deeply imbedded in my heart, the fight against childhood cancer.

Back in February,  I joined a Facebook group that are participating in a virtual Run to the White House.  The purpose of this, is to bring awareness to the epidemic of childhood cancer and hopefully turn the White House yellow for September in honor of childhood cancer awareness month. Maybe, if we're lucky, we can get some football players to wear yellow shoes and gloves!

Each day on the Run for the White House for Childhood Cancer Facebook page there are children who are struggling with treatment and parents who are dealing with a sick baby or possibly the tragic loss of a beautiful child.  As a parent, the idea of any of my little ones being sick, is my worse nightmare.   Even though I have read posts and blogs from parents who been affected my childhood cancer, I can hardly imagine what they are all going through.

While I, like many, have always been concerned about and donated towards childhood cancer, my passion really jumpstarted last fall when my husband turned me onto Taylor Swift's song Ronan, about the loss of a little boy to cancer.  Since then, I have been following Ronan's Mom's Blog, Rockstar Ronan and following her struggles with dealing with the loss of her baby boy.  Ronan's story, as well as the many other little ones who I have come to know, have really opened my eyes concerning the epidemic of childhood cancer, as well as re-emphasized the fragility of life.  We truly don't know what is around the corner.

So today, in honor of all these little ones battling for there lives, I ran 8.01 miles.  Brian Jones, the head of Run for the Whitehouse, challenged us to run 7 on the 7th "for the average of 7 children who will not survive cancer today, April 7."  I haven't run this far since the 90's due to old track injuries and birthing five babies, so when my Map My Run link came on my iPhone and informed me I had reached 7 miles, I loudly whooped several times.  As silly as it may sound, I literally was telling myself out loud, "You got this!" More importantly, I was willing my support for all the little ones battling cancer to know that we are here, we are supporting them, loving them, praying for them, cheering for them from all over the country and telling them, "You Got This!"

Walking home from school for miles!

When I arrived back in my neighborhood, my eight year old son was waiting to finish my run with me.  He had ran a few blocks with me as I started and helped to support me as I looped around an extra cul-de-sac to reach my 8 miles.  My family knows of my quest and has been very supportive, even helping to add a few miles of their own.  My mom and a few of my friends have joined Brian's cause and now I am hoping that some of my beloved readers will join it too! It's free and is as simple as liking Run for the White House for Childhood Cancer  on Facebook.  Then you write a message and post how far you have Run (or walked, biked or even swam.)  Brian keeps track of all the miles.

Life is a blessing and children are our greatest gift, we owe it to them to support any obstacle they may encounter, big or small.  If you can't join us and even if you can, please consider making a donation to fight childhood cancer.  

 

Are we trying to "Catfish" our Facebook Friends?

Photograph taken by me!

Catfish is a new show on MTV about people who initiate relationships with someone they met online.  The premise of the television show is that after some time has gone by, either months or even years, one of those in this unique tryst wants to meet this love of their technological life.  This is where Nev Schulman, Max and his crew come in.  They go through the process of interviewing the interested partner and then researching their cyber romance to see if they really are who they say.  Spoiler alert, for the most part, they're not!  Sometimes they're not even the same sex that they claimed to be.

The responses from this revelation are widely varied, and for the most part, the interested party feels a combination of anger and hurt.  The person they thought was a famous, rich model (for example) is actually just some average joe living at home struggling to get by like most people.  In the end, love is sometimes found and sometimes lost.  It just depends on the extent of the deceit and the ability of the jaded to forgive and understand.

What fascinates and draws me into this show, is how relatable the whole concept truly is.  At first, the deceiver might seem crazy and the deceived naive and gullible.  However, as I have continued to watch the show and really meditate on the idea of a "catfish,"  I realized that most of us are guilty of this very simple act of manipulating ourselves in a way that might seem attractive to others.  Maybe we don't go to the extreme that we might see on the television show, but we still deceive, even if they're the smallest "catfish" lies.

To prove my point, I am going to use Facebook as an example.  How many have profile pictures that are hideous?  Not many.  Instead, people make sure to pick just the right one, even if it is several years old or tweaked beyond recognition.  Moving beyond the "face" of Facebook, think of how we now pose for pictures or untag ourselves if we are not satisfied with what we look like.  I admit I am guilty of such things.

As I watched the show I thought of my own life.  I thought of my previous marriage and how what I chose to portray to the outside world was much different than what was actually going on.  After all, who wants to write on their Facebook status, "last night was miserable..." or, "found out my significant other is having a Cyber affair with someone on Facebook."  I chose to instead post pictures of my two youngest daughter's baptism and of our "happy" family.

The ironic thing about the show, is how often the people might have been deceiving about their physical self, but not their emotional one.  Because they felt comfortable with the look they chose to portray, it allowed them to be confident enough to let the true colors of their heart shine through.  (This was not always the case in Catfish episodes, but more common than not.)  There is something safe about the lack of actual face time and instead pouring out your soul over the anonymity of text messages and telephone calls.

My current husband and I started our relationship like that.  We met in person briefly, but the majority of our friendship grew through phone calls and text messages.  After pondering the motives of those on the Catfish episodes, I realized they just wanted to be heard and to have someone care about them.  They were lonely and looking for simple companionship, even if they went about it in a complex way.   I imagined they found the same comfort I did in having someone on the other line who actually cared about what I said, what I was going through and reciprocated by sharing their own thoughts and feelings.

No one is perfect.  I think that is the main point and premise of the show and of life.  However, if we feel we need to portray a spotless image in order to have friends and/or a romance, shows like Catfish will continue for years to come.  Since I have been divorced, I have made a concerted effort to lay it all out there.  Do I hold back details?  Absolutely and for good reasons.  However, this blog has given me an outlet to express my true feelings and to slowly tell the real story of my life.  Try it!  Put your catfishing aside and allow people a window into your world.  If people don't like your true "Face" then they can always de-friend you.  

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